"Follow plan X if Scott Bakula takes the bowling ball from the blue mountain"

Everything is going according to plan, my fellow Illuminatus.
The American colonies are once again being led by a S&C initiate.
Mr.Moore has successfully discredited the Alpha Centarians, our sworn enemy.

The Iraqi war has distracted the globe from the Fraternitas Saturni.
The men in black have switched Dan Rather with our own operative.
The Templars will discredit Kofe Anon.

EVERYTHING is going according to our plans.
HAIL THE ALL SEEING EYE! ILLUMINATION IS OURS!

Please report in...