A savage journey into the heart of desperation
Hunter S. Thompson must think he has triumphed. The pill-popping radical journalist of the 70's who believes "The Bush administration is a heap of Nazi sh*t."* should be firing off a few machine gun rounds in joy at CBS's ceaseless spin machine against the Bush administration. CBS's recent journey into politics could be taken straight out of one of Dr.Thompsons novels, complete with Hollywood starlights, ominous figures, bondage videos and an attempt by an American Corporation to undo the re-election of a sitting President.
Imagine you are reading a story of a desperate group of people with an agenda. Calls are made to Central Texas, documents are forged, and events are set into motion. A friendly face, trusted by the American people, is brought into the mix. He jumps into play, reporting lies and mistruths. Was it for yourself Dan, or is their a dirty secret somewhere in your closet that has caused you to be so transparent? Subsequent investigation by the underground blog community ensues, possible criminal charges will be filed, but the fun doesn't stop there.
Enter the hollywood starlet, one Ms. Cameron Diaz. A guest on the most watched afternoon talk show in the world, she slings accusations that the current President wants to make rape legal. The richest woman in the world looks on, shaking her head in agreement, helping the average housewife the emotional connection. Behind the scenes you have to wonder just how many more bondage videos Ms. Diaz has hidden in her past, how many more lines of cocaine Oprah hasn't admitted to. Drugs, sex and a propoganda of fear. How many housewifes cried that day? How many housewives believe the conspiracy?
We flip to the next chapter in disbelief that such a radical story could ever be true in America. The story centers on a small room, somewhere in the US, with a few well connected friends think up the next line of attack. It might have been written like this:
"We've tarnished W's reputation, we have the housewives afraid of being raped, who do we need to focus on now?"
"Lets go after the kids!"
"Not kids, kids make people crazy, they won't believe kids"
"Well... what about something not as direct? Maybe teenagers?"
"What does every teenager fear? Being drafted! Thats it - lets make up a draft and pin it on W!"
"Who's in our pocket? We still have that Congressman from New York?"
"Yeah, we've got Rangel, mix him in with Kerry, and we've got an issue, but whats the front line of attack?"
"CBS spent some it's trust, we'll have to prop it up with something else... maybe email?"
And thus was perhaps born the latest attack, a fake email about a Presidential draft by the Bush administration. Actually proposed by Democratic Congressman Rangel, spun by canidate Kerry and reported by fact from CBS news, this novel starts to reach a climax. It's badly written, and borrows too much from old fiction, but perhaps it has a happy ending.
Once again, just in time, the bloggers, the underground community comes to the rescue. They call CBS out, and the day is saved by a handful of radicals loosely networked to spread the truth. Not so many drugs this time, but CPU's and Google addiction are the tools of the free thinking populace.
It's just too bad that Hunter is on the wrong side of this revolution.
*Freezerbox
The Hunter S. Thompson Interview
BY ADAM BULGER
CULTURE | 3.9.2004